Teaser Tuesday

Here's how to play.

• Grab your current read
• Open to a random page
• Share “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
• BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!) 

From the start of Ted Kennedy: A Life by John Farrell, there's a push-pull between the comforts of wealth and privilege and the horror of sudden, violent death. When Ted was just 12, his oldest brother Joe Jr. was blown to bits in an in-air explosion during WWII. By the time he was 16, his brother-in-law Billy had been shot by a Nazi sniper and Billy's wife, Ted's sister Kathleen, went down in a plane crash. Then JFK became the oldest son who carried the family standard to new heights and was assassinated. That left Bobby Kennedy as the oldest son, and within 5 years, he, too, was murdered. So the baby, the ninth and last child, became the head of the family at age of 36. Nothing prepared Teddy for this because it was never supposed to be him. He was not suited by personality or propensity. Yet he was now surrogate father to his brothers' 13 children and the hopes of a heartbroken nation were riding on him. The responsibility was crushing. 

I found this observation from Ted Kennedy's youngest son, Patrick, insightful.

What is of interest to people who might study him is the conflict between who he was supposed to be and who he was. I think who he was, was an amazing, authentic person who loved a good time, who loved people, who was gregarious and social and yet, in a way, felt encumbered by a sense of, "I have to be something else and be serious-minded if I'm to be successful, if I'm to be taken seriously ..."

"The upside of my downside"

From page 435 of this book

In a consequential moment of self-awareness, Ted Kennedy understood that his reputation as a womanizer enabled him to be an early activist for AIDS awareness and legislation. His well-known love of the ladies meant he knew he wouldn't face whispers that he was gay because he supported funding for AIDS education and research.

That was in 1989. I didn't meet my darling friend Henry until 1992. One of the first things that we bonded over was our activism. He supported my efforts as a volunteer for Bill Clinton's Presidential campaign. I was there when he needed help for Chicago's annual AIDS Run and Walk. But one thing we never discussed was Ted Kennedy's pivotal role in the crafting and passage of The Ryan White CARE Act.

How I wish we had! I would have loved hearing Henry's take on it all. He was both a proud gay man and a Christian, a product of Catholic schools in Puerto Rico. He was raised to consider JFK, our first Catholic President, a hero. I know he would have observations and opinions on Ted Kennedy's role -- as a Catholic and as a rather rapacious heterosexual -- on AIDS.

Yeah, yeah. I know. "Grief is a journey, not a destination." But I miss Henry so much it hurts. 

I lost both of my parents and my favorite uncle, but I am so much lonelier after losing John and Henry this year. I hurt more. Maybe because I'm not as young or resilient anymore. Maybe because those men were too young to die. Maybe because they were the family I chose. I don't know. 

But I didn't expect this book about Ted Kennedy to trigger legit sorrow. I hate it when grief sneaks up on me like this.