It's raining

I'm using my "Rainy Day Fund" to help my sister hire an organizer so we can vacate our mother's house in a timely manner and then, on November 16, I'm going to LA to see my oldest friend for the weekend.

I have always pretended that money wasn't there, figuring I'd need it some dark day if I'm laid off. But that might not happen. And my mother did die and we do have to get out of her house and I need to laugh. And my birthday this year falls on Thanksgiving Day. I can't begin to imagine what a horrible day it will be. Two major events -- one day -- no Mom.

My kid sister is overwhelmed and simply frozen in place. I know she's mourning. I know she's scared and sad. I am, too. But she's gotta suck it up and get this done. There are legal ramifications if we aren't out of there on the date the reverse mortgage lender says. I have been putting off talking to them to give her more time but I simply can't keep stalling. It's bad for my stomach lining and it's not wise financially or legally. So she just has to get on the stick and hire one of the organizers I sent her information for. Thus far she hasn't been able to bring herself to even phone one. She needs help getting the estate sale and I'll assist her but she's got to hire someone.

Yet last night my oldest friend had me laughing because she ran into Jane Fonda ... and Jane Fonda didn't know her. Logically, there is no reason for Jane Fonda to know my friend. It's just that Jane's been such an iconic presence throughout our lives and looked so familiar that for a moment, my friend expected Jane to recognize her and say "hi."

We somehow decided to have a slumber party with Jane, Jennifer Aniston and Maria Shriver -- other women we think we know and like but who don't know us. I loved the thought of the five of us sitting around in jammies, talking about boys. And we agreed that Jane, Jen and Maria have juicy stories to tell.

Anyway, it was fun to laugh. I need to laugh. And I can't just keep talking about my mom's passing and her estate over and over and over.

So I'm using my Rainy Day Fund, first on an organizer and then on an airline ticket. And in 7 weeks, the house should be empty and I'm off to LA. Seven weeks ... I can get through that.

Between midnight and 6:00 AM

I got a letter from the local utility company that says I use substantially more power between those hours than my neighbors. It was part of a public service initiative, helping us conserve energy and save on our bills.

When my mom stayed with me a year ago, after my surgery, she was appalled that I kept my lights on all night long. Part of it I do for security -- as a woman living alone, I want it to always look like people are here and awake and moving about, regardless of the hour. Part of it is that I have trouble falling asleep -- it has to happen naturally and organically, usually while I'm reading or watching TV. If I crawl into bed after turning everything off and lay there in the dark and quiet, I get so nervous and uncomfortable.

But to me, the thing was, my mom would be so entertained to know that my flagrant nocturnal use of electricity has come to the attention of the local power company. But I can't tell her. Because she died two weeks ago.