Good news!

One of Illinois' senators, Mark Kirk, suffered a major stroke earlier this year and, after initial press briefings that painted his physical impairment as severe but his cognitive skills in tact, we have heard precious little.

Well, today I received my email newsletter from the Senator, the first in ages! He's still in a rehabilitation facility, but he's doing Senate work and is taking visits from colleagues. Sen. Kirk even met with Prime Minister Netanyahu. So he's on the mend, and that's good.

I'm a worrier.

Who's that voter?

I just voted for Mitt Romney in the Illinois Primary.

Mitt Romney is a good and honorable man with whom I disagree on everything.

Rick Santorum, on the other hand, encourages real hate in people and it scares me.

Last night I got one of those robocalls, funded by a Santorum superpac, where I was "warned" about all the rights Romney gave gays in Massachusetts and then it closed with a plea that I be "a good Christian or Jew" and vote for Santorum.

So I set the alarm clock a little early and got up and voted for Romney. After all, I support gay rights! And as far as I'm concerned, whoever is responsible for that call knows nothing about being a "good Christian or Jew."

Besides, this poor state has already endured Blago. If we help Santorum retain the limelight, the humiliation will be so great that all citizens of voting age will be forced to wear glasses and a fake nose with moustache to disguise our shame.