What the fu...

Thursday Dick Cheney gave a speech on national security, timed to begin right after President Obama finished an address on the same subject so that Cheney could get equal, unfettered network coverage.

Why? There is only one Pope, only one Heavyweight Champion of the World, and one President at a time. Today the President is Barack Obama. Why should Cheney's thoughts be given the same authority? Dick Cheney not only isn't President, he never was President.

I don't want to hear about Cheney's national security cred. Bush-Cheney had been in office for more than 8 months when Al-Queda hit the World Trade Center. Cheney wasn't protecting me when those planes were headed for the Twin Towers.

I don't want to live in a torture state. Neither do 240,000 of my neighbors who stood beside me last November in Grant Park, when we listened to Barack Obama's acceptance speech. Nationally Barack Obama won 365 electoral votes. The country wants to turn the page on the fear-mongering and the arrogance of the last eight years.

This man personifies fear-mongering and arrogance. Why can't he just borrow a page from Mondale and Quayle and shut up?

If I were to steal a meme …

… it would be from Kwizgiver!

If I were a direction I’d be… left-to-center
If I were furniture I’d be… my green sofa
If I were a liquid I’d be… Classic Coke
If I were a sin I’d be… sloth
If I were a gem/stone I’d be… lapis
If I were a metal I’d be… aluminum
If I were a tree I’d be… a maple
If I were a fruit I’d be… a grape
If I were a flower I’d be… a snapdragon
If I were weather I’d be… sunny, dry, and never over 75º
If I were a musical instrument I’d be… a piano
If I were an element I’d be… wind
If I were a color I’d be… green

If I were an animal I’d be… an okapi (isn't she great?)

If I were a sound I’d be… a cat's purr

If I were a lyric I’d be… "Shall I wait a lonely lifetime? If you want me to, I will." ("I Will" from The White Album)


If I were a song I’d be… "The Authority Song" by John Mellencamp
If I were a music type I’d be… pop
If I were a perfume/cologne I’d be… Lovely
If I were a feeling I’d be… rolling with it
If I were a book I’d be… a biography
If I were food I’d be… a cheeseburger in paradise
If I were a city I’d be… beside an ocean or a Great Lake
If I were a taste I’d be… cinnamon
If I were a scent I’d be… light and powdery
If I were a word I’d be… gubernatorial, because it's so much to say
If I were a verb I’d be… laughing
If I were an object I’d be… a freshly-sharpened pencil
If I were a piece of clothing I’d be… jeans
If I were a body part I’d be… a foot, feeling pretty after a pedi
If I were an facial expression I’d be… amused
If I were a cartoon character I’d be… Bugs Bunny (or Bullwinkle)
If I were a movie I’d be… a tearjerker
If I were a geometrical figure I’d be… a rectangle
If I were one of the 4 seasons I’d be… autumn
If I were a sentence I’d be… "But see, here's the thing."

If you play along, let me know so we can compare answers.