Sad but true

Actually overheard while waiting in line for Borat:

"I wanna see Bobby. Lindsay Lohan is in it."

I look at that poster, see the words, "He saw wrong and tried to right it, saw suffering and tried to heal it, saw war and tried to stop it," and mist up. She walks by and sees Lindsay Lohan's credit. I can only shake my head.

Oh, well ... I haven't seen the movie yet, but I suppose it's possible that she'll go to see Lindsay Lohan, but will leave the theater with an awakened sense of populism.

Really. I either have to think that, or cry.

I wanted to love it ...

… but, alas, I only liked Borat.

I think that even at only 84 minutes, it's a little long. The segment where our hero ruins the antique store ran on a bit, and it seemed like every piece after that could have been edited some.

Which is not to say I didn't enjoy it. I did. And I certainly appreciated much of what Mr. Cohen was trying to say. It's just that I'd heard this was the funniest movie ever. And I believe I laughed longer and harder at Animal House.

So hi, Mr. Sagdiyev, I'm Eric Stratton and I'm damn glad to meet you. While I hope that your cultural learnings of America will make benefit glorious nation of Kazakhstan, I'm afraid you're no Bluto Blutarsky.

The dirty little secret behind the Senator's joke

Senator Kerry botched what would have been an unfunny joke. That's one thing that happened just before the election.

The other thing that happened is that he accidentally spoke an ugly truth, one that no one wishes to confront, and that's part of why the story wouldn't die.

It is the poor and lower middle class who are fighting in Iraq.

A friend of mine lives in Deerfield, IL. "The Community that Lives and Works Together." Home of Walgreens. A cheap home in Deerfield is $200,000. The most expensive one listed on Realtor.com is $9,990,000 (6 BR, 9 BA). It is historically very Republican and many of her friends are staunch supporters of the war. As the mother of two sons, she asked her neighbors how they, as parents, could be so enthusiastic, could not have second thoughts, about a venture that is turning into a meat grinder for our young. The response? "90% of the kids in this district go on to college."

How reprehensible is that? And how different is it from what Senator Kerry said (but didn't mean, about doing well in school so you don't "get stuck in Iraq?"

As a girl I was so marked by the Viet Nam conflict it's practically a tattoo on my soul, so I can't believe I'm saying this ... but maybe we need a draft. Maybe then people would look at war differently, if it was possible that their precious little Caleb or Jason or even Brittany would have to go, fight and die.

Lonely for words unspoken

I know my best friend trusts me and thinks I'm funny. I also know that he admires my prodigious moral compass, which most people think makes me a pain in the ass. (The evening we went shopping for his mother's birthday present was memorable; I believe after hearing the phrase "blood diamonds" about a thousand times, he ended up giving her pearls.) I know he feels this way because he drunk dialed me. Actually, he drunk dialed my voicemail, which is safer (and even more gutless).

He is far more comfortable, though, ribbing me. Teasing me. If my hair was longer, he would pull my ponytail. I like to think this is his way of sublimating sexual tension. But then, I like to think that Martin Sheen is President.

My best friend makes thoughtful little gestures. He sends me song downloads and magazine articles he thinks I'd appreciate. Most recently he purchased a lovely little tome about farting called "Pee-Ew, Is that You, Bertie?" for my six year old nephew, who loved every page. My birthday is next week, and I know he will remember it with a gift that is just as appropriate.

I need to hear him say it, though. I want him to tell me, sober, that I matter to him, that I am special to him. Sometimes I want to hear it so badly that I ache.